Reconciling Joy and Sorrow: Memorial Day Reflections
Memorial Day often brings images of flags, barbecues, and long weekends. But beneath the surface, this holiday can stir something deeper—a quiet ache, a lingering memory, a grief that doesn’t go away just because the calendar tells us it’s time to celebrate.
Honoring Edward P. Void, WWII veteran, and the countless others whose service stories stretch across generations. Every name carries a legacy—and often, a grief still felt today.
For some, it’s a reminder of loved ones lost in service. For others, it may awaken unspoken grief, generational trauma, or the complicated layers of surviving something they never talk about.
In memory of Cheyenne warrior Hahpehe Onahe, who fell in 1876 defending their way of life. This ground holds more than one history—and more than one kind of grief.
As a PMHNP, I often see people trying to “pick a side” with their feelings: Am I supposed to feel thankful or heavy? Grateful or numb? Joyful or tired?
The truth is, you don’t have to choose.
You’re allowed to hold both.
Joy and sorrow can live in the same breath.
Gratitude doesn’t cancel out pain.
Healing doesn’t mean forgetting.
It means learning how to sit with both—and honoring what each feeling is here to teach you.
A Small Grounding Practice
If this weekend brings up more than words, try this:
- Sit somewhere quiet. Place your feet on the ground.
- Place one hand on your heart, the other on your belly.
- Breathe in gently for 4 counts, hold for 2, exhale for 6.
- Let your body remember that you are safe in this moment.
You don’t have to “fix” the feeling.
You just have to meet it.
If You’re Struggling This Holiday, You’re Not Alone
Whether you're navigating fresh grief, trauma responses, or old memories that resurface without warning, support is available. You don’t have to carry it alone.
Here are a few trusted resources:
- Veterans Crisis Line: Call or text 988, then press 1
https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/
- National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988
https://988lifeline.org
- NAMI Helpline: 1-800-950-NAMI (6264)
https://nami.org/HelpLine
- RAINN: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
https://rainn.org
A field of sacrifice—seen and unseen—beneath an open sky at Little Bighorn National Cemetery. Silence does not mean absence.
A Gentle Invitation
If you’re looking for mental health support, grounding tools, or a safe space to begin again—I invite you to explore my 7 Days of Tactile Self-Care guide, (link below) or book a session when you're ready. You don’t have to walk this alone.
7 days of Tactile self-Care guide link: https://www.myjourneycompasshealth.com/s/7_Days_of_Tactile_Self_Care_Guide.pdf
This Memorial Day, however you’re feeling, may you find small moments of peace. You are not broken. You are healing. And you are held.
Photo Credits: All images taken by Leonarda Gaige at Little Bighorn Battlefield National Monument in Crow Agency, Montana—including gravesites honoring U.S. veterans and Cheyenne warriors. Used with respect and remembrance.